the Chapel

It wasn’t until a few months ago that I heard Andrew Harvey talking about dangerous prayers.

But by then it was too late.

Several years ago I was traveling to Siberia with my brother for our Finding Silence Project. We were going to be meeting with Russian Orthodox monks while there, so in preparation for the journey I read The Philokalia, and The Way of the Pilgrim. This was my first introduction to the Jesus Prayer, the Eastern Orthodox contemplative tradition where you endeavour to repeat the prayer inwardly, over and over, until you become the living embodiment of the prayer.

The practice appealed to me, though the specific contents of the prayer did not. So I decided to use a prayer of my own devising and dove right in. At the time I knew nothing of dangerous prayer, of prayer that should only be used with supervision. (To be clear, I am, not talking about dark magic and summoning oogie boogies here, may i see things as they really are is an example of a dangerous prayer. If you are unsupervised and unprepared, an answering of this prayer would likely be a tad overwhelming) But I was uninformed and ravenous, so I eagerly banged on the door of the divine, and made my demands.

After 18 months of clanging and howling, a warning shot came across the bow. Blind, and undaunted, i continued. 6 months later, my prayers were fully answered. And boy was it not what I was expecting. Somehow the rainbows and bliss and unicorns of my encounter with the divine didn’t look quite like what I expected.

This answering of my prayers catapulted me in to a profound journey into the underworld, into death and the throes of transformation, and perhaps rebirth. Through the depths of a billion years of geologic time to the inside of a monarch’s chrysalis, chewed up, spit out, left for dead, and tended to by various angels, in human, plant, and animal form. And on to 200 acres of land in rural South Carolina, where I am building a “chapel”. It’s a loooooooong, crazy story, and I’m happy to share it with you if you want to hear it. Or you can wait for the book to come out. Which will probably be several years since i’m still in the throes of it.

What an astounding and astonishing thing this life is.

The Chapel will consist of 4 land art sites, stone/gold sculptures, a book, a fragrance, and a series of paintings made with inks, charcoal, and pastels made from the land during the creation of the chapel.